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14 May 2011 @ 03:04 pm
Boston Legal - Twist and Bend (But Handle with Care)  
Title: Twist and Bend (But Handle with Care)
Author: clair_de_lune
Fandom: Boston Legal
Characters: Shirley Schmidt, Alan Shore
Category: Gen
Rating: PG
Word Count: ~ 220
Disclaimer: Not mine. Just borrowing them for a while.
Summary: We infer from it. We interpret it. We twist it.

Prompt by sterling_sky: Boston Legal, Shirley Schmidt, the law vs. the legal profession. The result is probably more about the law vs. legal practice than the law vs. the legal profession, but well...
No beta so please let me know if you spot grammatical weirdness. I mean it ;)

“We turn around it. We infer from it. We interpret it. We twist it. We bend it. We use it,” Shirley enumerated, looking as though she could go on forever, her eyes trained on Alan’s impassible face. He smirked at her, and she knew what was coming. She sighed in indulgent resignation even before he opened his mouth.

“Now, don’t talk dirty to me, Shirley. That’s not fair when we’re arguing. You know what it does to me.”

“What we do not do is breaking it or degrading it,” she added, ignoring the interruption.

“Oh, again with the dirty talk... What happens when it isn’t enough to make things right?”

“Then be a hit man or a Bostonian version of Dexter Morgan. Don’t give me the ‘You can rape Law, provided you give it a fine child’ crap because I’m pretty sure you can see the issue here.”

“So what you did in court today was...?”

Shirley raised her chin.

“Bending it really low. It’s supple. If you handle it carefully, it will spring back up.”

The elevator doors opened with a victorious chime; Alan stepped aside to let her get out first.

“Just so you know, Shirley, you merely have to snap your fingers to have me turn around, twist, bend really low, and be used.”

“And spring back into my face? I’ll pass.”


End note: The actual quote is “You can rape History, provided you give it a fine child.” (Alexandre Dumas)
--Comments are always welcome.
Current Mood: restlessrestless
one of those regular weird people.: Allison - RADIATIN' MY BRILLIANCE ON YOUsterling_sky on May 14th, 2011 04:39 pm (UTC)
Oh god, I *LOVE* this!!!! I could hear Shirley and Alan clear as day... For a girl who didn't think she could come up with anything "because... Boston Legal," that was pretty damn impressive. :D
Clair de Lune: boston legalclair_de_lune on May 14th, 2011 09:03 pm (UTC)
Aww, thank you :D
But that's true. Boston Legal... I have the same issue with The West Wing: smart shows, smart characters, smart writing. They scare me. I can manage short and/or crackastic pieces, but I wouldn't venture writing something longer or really serious. That said, as far as this ficlet is concerned, yay! And thanks again for the prompt :)