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11 August 2010 @ 05:58 pm
Crossover - Small Talk between Heroines II, aka Their Best Qualities  
Title: Small Talk between Heroines II, aka Their Best Qualities
Author: clair_de_lune
Fandoms: The Pretender, The Avengers, The West Wing, Prison Break, Boston Legal
Characters: Miss Parker, Mrs. Peel, CJ Cregg, Sara Tancredi, Shirley Schmidt
Category: Gen
Rating: PG
Word Count: ~ 700
Disclaimer: Not mine. Just borrowing them for a while.
Summary: They’re women of striking qualities. (Crackastic)
Author’s Note: Written for rosie_spleen’s Bleeding Cuticles Challenge (Day 8).

Many thanks to mystressxoxo for the beta.
This is a companion piece/sequel for Small Talk between Heroines (and yes, I’ve replaced Carrie Bradshaw with Shirley Schmidt).

Miss Parker

Miss Parker lighting up a cigarette starts it all. The other women protest loudly, groan and say the living room is going to stink.

“I thought you’d quit?” Sara points out disapprovingly. She knows about addiction and beating it and how awful it is to fall back into it. She’s this close to snagging the cigarette from Parker’s fingers, but... well, she’d rather not have her head ripped off – again.

“So. Sue me.”

The contestation reaches another level when Mrs. Peel grabs a cigarette. She shrugs. “Hey. I’m from the 60s. It was not that a big deal back then.”

“This isn’t the best of your qualities, Parker,” Shirley sighs.

“Do you have a best quality, Parker?” CJ inquires mockingly.

“I have a big gun. And I use it.”

Mrs. Peel

“I’m the smartest, fearless person around.”

Four pairs of eyebrows arch very high.

“I’ve been tested,” she explains. “I’m smarter than Steed, which is no small feat, and those fear merchants weren’t able to find even the smallest phobia in me.”

The rest of the troop doesn’t even bother asking about the ‘fear merchants’. You have to take some things for granted when dealing with Emma and her quite peculiar job.

“You don’t even fear lack of champagne?” Parker points out with irony.

“That’s Steed’s phobia, not mine.”

Sara grins. “So, I think we can establish that your best quality is your undying confidence in yourself.”

Mrs. Peel raises her glass to Sara. “Indeed, my dear.”

CJ Cregg

“I’m delicious, delightful and patient.”

They wait for more. So far, so good; nothing exaggerated.

“I’ve asked my assistant to burn down the press briefing room several times, but I’ve always changed my mind. I’ve never killed a reporter, no matter how often I’ve dreamed of strangling a few of them with my bare hands. Although... on a few occasions, I’ve taken some of them down badly.”

“I remember that,” Parker says, teeth showing in a predatory grin.

“I’ve never kicked Toby Ziegler or Josh Lyman’s ass.”

Shirley smirks. “You mean physically? Because metaphorically...”

“Oh, sure. Metaphorically, I’d say sitting must have been painful a few times.” She nods her head. “The President, on the other hand...” She raises a finger at Sara to signal her that she’s talking about her President, not Sara’s. “Sometimes, if the Secret Service hadn’t been around...”

Parker blows out a ring of smoke. “So, your best quality is not having kicked your President’s ass? And I’m allegedly the one with the violent tendencies?”

CJ reclines in the sofa. “Have you ever been trapped on a plane, sitting through a six-hour long lecture on national parks?”

Delicious, delightful and patient.

Sara Tancredi

“I’m modest and resilient. The strong and nice woman standing by her man and supporting him. And I’m happy to be that woman.”

She thinks Parker may slap her; she’s sure Shirley and CJ are rolling their eyes; Mrs. Peel is looking at her with a small pout and asks her if she’s sure she’s not from the 60s.

Maybe they’re right.

Wait a minute. They’re so right.

“Oh, what the fucking hell! I’m awesome. I jump through windows, I iron badass ex-agents, I shoot people, including my bitch of a mother-in-law. And I do all that stuff while keeping my head cool. Well, almost always keeping my head, and almost always keeping cool.”

Parker high-fives her. “Atta girl.”

Shirley Schmidt

“I’m Schmidt.”

Shirley shrugs and rests at that. Enough said. At least, she thinks so until she realizes that the assembly is waiting for a tiny bit of development.

“I’m clever, rich, successful, witty, and hot. In five years, I’ve been lusted after more than any woman a third of my age.”

“Yes. Yes, you certainly are all of that, but you’re also, you know... a lawyer,” CJ says, lowering her voice and scrunching her nose in dismay. “I’ve worked with lawyers. Maddening people.”

“I have high moral standards, but I can stay open to other people’s opinions.”

“Maddening, maddening people,” CJ insists.

“And unlike some of my colleagues, my ego can fit in a room.”

“You must have big offices at your firm,” Parker says.

“Why... yes. How did you guess?”

* *

--Comments are always welcome.
Current Mood: frustratedfrustrated
Clair de Lune: pb - sara3clair_de_lune on August 12th, 2010 11:00 am (UTC)
Maybe my summary shoud've been "They're women of striking qualities and ego, huh? *g*